Two minutes to Midnight...

Last week, I came home to a pile of boxes stacked against my back door. Thinking it was finally my Zulily order from 2 weeks ago, I told the boys to grab a box. As we opened our packages, I found fabric, fabric and more fabric. A small card was attached from someone I had never met telling me they hoped I could use this fabric for African dresses. "Huh...well, Lord," I thought. "I really wasn't planning on making anymore dresses, but if You sent me fabric, you have a purpose for it." Around this time, mom stumbled upon this website: http://www.newlifenicaragua.org/ She called me. Sounding a little angry, she was telling me how it sickened her seeing these little orphans running around in dumps without shoes. "I KNOW they have shoes in Nicaragua. We BUY shoes from Nicaragua." Mom emailed the orphanage and asked if they needed shoes. She also told the woman that I had just received 4 boxes of fabric, and did they have a need for that too? The owner replied she had just been in a meeting talking about the "fabric situation" and how God was "right on time." Some local women are trying to get above poverty and need it for a little business. (It gets better! Isn't God good?"
 Well, next, we ran into shipping problems. How would we get these shoes & fabric down to Nicaragua? (Oh, yes, did I MENTION, we're collecting shoes for orphans now?) A friend of a friend in mom's town is traveling to Nicaragua, and offered to deliver it. I am always amazed at how the Lord orchestrates these things. Mom, still confused on where this fabric came from, called me this morning. 
"So, how do you know this person?"
I don't. My friend Debbie told her about the African dresses.
"And you know Debbie from where?"
Oh, we met online a few years back. I've never actually met her, but I know her.  
Again, is this not just God sized? Now, onto 2 minutes to Midnight...   

I was upstairs this morning cleaning the bubbies room. Legos, Kynex, and various other small items scattered their floor. Remember my cleaning system for the boys rooms? Well, apparently, I didn't either. I had my phone on KLove listening to music, and stewing over various things in my head. I was feeling angry and hurt. Someone close to me is going down the wrong path, and it's breaking my heart. Lately, I've been so angry at them. Now, let me preface this by saying, I am the queen of second chances. I have been the black sheep, worn the scarlet letter, and sunk so far deep into sin, I didn't think I'd ever crawl back out. One day, I pray the Lord gives me the courage to share my FULL testimony, but I'm not ready yet. My own insecurities, and worries of others judging me and thinking less of me hinder me from sharing it. However, a few times, I have run  into someone who is at a rock bottom place, and the Lord allowed me to share my stories of grace and forgiveness with them. 

Sin is a slippery slope my friends. It will end up breaking your heart, and everyone who loves you. My great grandmother used to say, "Sin will keep you longer than you ever wanted to stay, and take you further than you ever wanted to go." As I was talking to the Lord, I told Him I knew He could help this person, because He pulled me from the depths of my own sin. He made me clean. He forgave me. I realized, this anger I had been directing at this person was hurt, the kind of hurt that burns so badly that the only way you can handle it is by putting a bandaid of anger over it. I heard this song, and immediately broke down in tears. Maybe my heart breaks so much, because I know the regret and pain this person will feel when she realizes how she's grieved the Lord. I still feel anguish over my sin and the pain it caused my family and friends. 
Here are the lyrics: "Who You Are" by Unknown

I  know that look you're givin' like you got something to prove
'Cause I have walked for miles and miles in that same pair of shoes
You refuse forgiveness like it's something to be earned
But sometimes pain's the only way that we can learn
Chorus:
You can never fall too hard, so fast, so far
That you can't get back when you lost where you are
It's never too late so bad
So much that you can't change who you are
Ohhhh, Ohhh
You can change who you are
Ohhh, ohhh.
You believe in freedom, but you dont know how to choose
You gotta step out of your feelings that you're so afraid to lose
Everyday, yeah, you put your feet on the floor
You gotta walk through the door, it's never gonna be easy
But it's all worth fighting for
Chorus:
You can never fall too hard, so fast, so far
That you can't get back when you lost where you are
It's never too late so bad
So much that you can't change who you are
Ohhhh, Ohhh
You can change who you are
Ohhh, ohhh
So let the ashes fall wherever they land
Come back from wherever you've been
To the foot of the cross to the feet of Jesus
The feet of Jesus
Chorus:
You can never fall too hard, so fast, so far
That you can't get back when you lost where you are
It's never too late so bad
So much that you can't change who you are
You can never fall too hard, so fast, so far
That you can't get back when you lost where you are
It's never too late so bad
So much that you can't change who you are
At the foot of the cross you change who you are
At the foot of the cross you change who you are
Ohhhh, Ohhh
You can change
Ohhh, ohhh. 

James 5:16 "The effective fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much."
During this journey, I have enlisted prayer warriors to pray with our family. I know that many times while I was far away from the Lord, prayers of fellow brothers and sisters helped bring me back to the cross. One of my prayer partners wrote and told me to not give up or be discouraged, that the Lord usually works two minutes to midnight. If mom and I ever start our own non-profit charity, we're going to call it "Two Minutes to Midnight." The Lord does all for His glory and His honor. So, for those of you who may need a little encouragement today, remember, His timing is not our own. Do not give up hope. Do not stop praying. The Lord sometimes delivers two minutes to Midnight. <3 Suzzy

Teeth, faux flu, and cleaning in your bra kind of day.

 I'm a big faker. I woke up this morning feeling achy, nauseous and with a pounding headache. (And no, I was not sipping any moonshine last night) I really did feel awful. Mr. Man, and the 10 yr old had headaches too, so we skipped church. Apparently, we're all big fakers, because by 11am, we were all feeling better. Mr. Man headed to the city to pick me up a TEAS test study guide and took all of the boys with him. *Bless him.* In two weeks, I will take my entrance test for Dental Hygiene School, and by May, I'll find out whether or not I'm in. This has been 3 years in the making. Why Dental Hygiene? Well, I like teeth. I can't deal with pee or poo, the pay is good, and the hours better. I blame Mom. Her power of persuasion seeped into my subconscious and thus I began my journey. 

This is a picture of a rootcanal in process. I got to see two of these this past week during my observations. I was pretty much giddy. That's how you really know this is what you want to do. When someone shows you different forms of rotting teething, and you feel all excited. My Mom told me "Believe or not, not everyone loves going to the dentist." WHAT? Say it ain't true!!!! Anywho, onto today....

 
Here's my dirty little secret: my bedroom & master bath are always a hot mess. Today, as I was on the phone looking for a pair of tweezers to get a few stray babies on my chin, I noticed the mold growing on the track of our shower door. 10 minutes later, I was stripped down to my bra and underwear sweating and scrubbing our shower clean. I'm not exactly sure how this happend, but I ended up taking a bucket of bleach water and scrubbing down the baseboards in the bathroom. 30 minutes later, my nose was filled with the smell of bleach, and I lost my motivation to mop the floor. 

Here's a rare glimpse into the least scene room of my house. Our bathroom is the most neglected room. I've never gotten around to decorating it. (6.5 years later) and it becomes of the catch all of "Only wore for a few hours, too lazy to hang it up clothes" and other random items I fully intend on putting away. The first 6 months were in the house, my hand towel rack, and the main towel rack fell off of the wall. Apparently, the previous owners' hubby wasn't much of a handyman. You would think we would have gotten more hardware and put it up. By we I of course mean Mr. Man. I blame him. I don't know what his aversion is to hanging or nailing things. The man will build me shelves, weld a fire pit for the backyard, and manufacture his own moonshine, er, ethanol gas, but he despise having to hang things. After I was done cleaning, tweezers long forgotten, I decided 2013 will be the year we do something with the master bath, even if I have to HIRE someone to re-hang those towel racks.
And dear ones, if anyone has any suggestions on bathroom decor, I'm all ears! I would really like to go for a black and baby blue, or yellow and something. I'm transitioning into happy colors: pretty greens, yellows, reds and blues!