Wanted: Baby for Rent

(I decided I need a little mental break from the plague IE: flu that has been in our house for over a month. Oldest child is currently moaning on the couch with a 100.6 fever. I've barely left the house in weeks, and feel like i am losing my mind. So, here is a conversation Mom and I had the other day, enjoy.)

Wanted: Baby for Rent

Oh, sweet babies! Our family hasn't had a sweet baby to love on in 3 years. Liam was the last grandbaby, and family functions just aren't the same without a sweet baby to pass around and love on. Mom and I were talking the other day about how nice it would be to rent a baby, but we would only need it for certain times. You know those want ads? Well, I've compiled one of my own.

Wanted: Mom of 4 done having kids seeks baby to rent, duties would include, but are not limited to:

• A baby to take to the grocery store and sit in the cart to talk to 
• A baby to take on a walk in a stroller on a nice day
• A baby to buy cute things for: toys, clothes, sweet little hats
• A baby to snuggle and take afternoon naps with
• A baby to pass around at family events and make laugh
• A baby to take to the zoo and park and show all of the animals and fishies too

Baby must love walks and car rides. No teethers please. Since I enjoy waking up quietly, and like my evenings to myself, preferable hours are between 9am-5pm. Baby must be happy, and enjoy being held by a whole room. Would prefer a baby that coo'd, pointed, and smiled easily. (This is negotiable) Rates are: free babysitting. Please include a picture and video with your application. Thanks. 

=) Know anyone with a baby like that? Mom and I can dream. =)